Capturing Your Grief: Day 6

For today we are supposed to post what not to say to someone who has suffered a loss. Here are just a few that were bothersome to me.

You'll still have your neice's to take care of!

True, but I'm not their mother and I don't get to make life changing decisions for them.  Nor do I get to experience the motherly bond that my sisters get to. I'm just the aunt who has no real purpose other then to spoil.

The right baby just hasn't found you yet!

One of our first nurse practitioners said this to me in the hopes that it would make me feel better. All it made me want to do was want to find another doctor. 

Carlos and you need to get over it and be happy for your sister!

Not even a couple weeks after our first loss my sister found out she was expecting.  She was afraid to tell us because of our loss and of how we would react. I sucked up my pride and congratulated her because I knew it was the right thing to do. Yet for some reason after that we kept getting told to suck up our feelings even more for her sake. I just didn't get it. I was happy, but I couldn't help but feel betrayed.

Haunted Mansion Stretch Photos

To continue on with my Haunted Mansion theme at my home I decided to make these easy and kid spook friendly stretch photos. All you need is three 4x4 in. canvas boards, mod podge and the stretch photos from Doom Buggies.

On his photo they are all stuck together so you will have to crop each one by themselves and then print. Then mod podge the canvas and place the photo on top. Make sure the canvases are properly aligned. Now you can either cut them apart or just leave them as is. I think I might leave mine as is, but who knows. :)

Capturing Your Grief: Day 5

This is the memorial that we have started to build in our home for our children. It's right in the dining room, next to the kitchen. This personally is one of my favorite place in our home. I spend most of my time in the kitchen or around it baking or doing a craft or two. To me this is the perfect spot because it feels like I bring them a little closer and that they are there with me as I do the things I love everyday and wish they were really doing with me. 

Capturing Your Grief: Day 4

Today we had to share our most treasured item/s. This was kind of hard at first because I didn't have something someone had given me or baby clothes that we has brought home from a hospital like some people. We didn't make it that far. Then I remembered the wind chimes that we had bought not to long after the first loss. I wanted a gentle reminder that our child and now children will always be with us. It's very comforting.

Capturing Your Grief: Day 3

Today we are suppose to post a picture after our loss. I've experienced multiple losses, but felt the first loss would be the most significant. After all it was the one that has left us on this downward spiral.

I will admit right now that I'm loving this project! I remember when we lost our first child and it was the hardest. I decided to shut it all in for my husband's sake since he was taking it harder and not necessarily act like it didn't happen, but try to smile and see it in a different light. I never really grieved, which made it especially harder when I found out a couple weeks later after it happens my sister was expecting. I don't think I ever tried so hard to put on my happy face. This project has given me the ability to let go some of those feeling that were probably there from the very get-go. 

In this photo I'm holding some slippers I had found in my excitement and just had to buy.   I hung them from the Christmas tree and felt so uplifted. Looking at this picture now, it just brings back all the heartache. Knowing that it wasn't our time to be parents yet and feeling so robbed!

Thank you everyone who is joining me on my daily grieving journey!

Capturing Your Grief: Day 2

On this day we are supposed to post a picture of us before our loss. At first I wasn't quite sure what to do because all of my losses were early and I had no pregnancy glimmer photos. What was I was to do? Then I decided on a picture of my husband and I on the ferris wheel, happy and carefree.  Oblivious to what would lie ahead.  It shows the same emotions I felt when I first found out. So excited that I even hugged the nurse. 

Capturing Your Grief 2012

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss, for me this is truly a personal time to reflect and pay tribute! Carley Dudley has come up with an amazing concept of sharing how you felt thru pictures in 31 days. Yesterday, October 1st was a sunrise. I was hoping to capture one of Arizona's amazing sunrises but living in town doesn't help. I love this picture none the less. 

If you would like to partake in this the website is http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/2012/09/capture-your-grief-this-october-2012-for-pregnancy-infant-loss-awareness-month.html .